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havent updated in a billion years... [02 Jan 2006|03:35pm] [ mood | okay ] not that anyone really reads mine anyway.. but id figure id vent to the world of internet.. its senior year.. wow.. and its almost half way over which is kinda very scary. life is okay. ive probably got the best friends in the world. so they make my life a different adventure everyday. ive now been single for about 5 months and i can honestly say i miss him.. but i guess its better for me now. ive been accepted to 3 colleges so far.. *UNH( in my top 3 ) - very happy about that *Scranton University *Franklin Pierce University its been pretty crazy waiting to hear from colleges..im really hoping to get into quinnipiac university,, so keep your fingers crossed. but haveing like 3 top schools it also very good too. for the acting bit. i had a lead in the fall drama " Three Doors to Death" - I played the character of DOlly Bray. it was pretty amazing. Now i am in Footloose. I have the role of Betty Blast, also being an ensemble member, and student director. So its pretty busy. senior classes are pretty tough. i mean im one of the few that actually picked hard classes all year.. ouch i kno.. so cramming is TOTALLY not fun. i cant wait for summer . back to camp. the one place where you can always go back too. im going to get a job as a day camp counselor this summer. to avoid the deal with now being 18 and not getting paid. day camp staff is going to be totally kick ass this year because there is a lot of us! plus every night and weekend off.. you couldnt ask for more. a lot of my friends from home are mad im going away to hirock again this summer considering its the last summer b4 college. so i already planned the roadtrip to jersey.. so i will be home for 1 weekend. dont worry! prom is pretty crazy because im not so sure who i want to take. some one from hirock. i cant stand jackson boys.. no jersey boys in general.. they all suck - xmas break was pretty kick ass.. i might have to add i had the most kick ass new years drama kids partay yet.. =) i love my dramies.. they keep me going liz + cat came down and that just made it so much better.. they are practally my life.. and i have the sexy 6 necklace.. its finally back.. whooop.. my ipod totally just dies.. so i have no music to listen too right now.. so thats a sign to stop typoing so much.. special thanks to sar, jer, liz + cat <- without youy 4 .. i dont know what i would do.. i love u girls! 3 comments|post comment

[22 Sep 2005|10:04pm] so life is going okay.. okay meaning there is one thing that is constantly on my mind making it bad.i need to left out a FEELING FART! so this summer was amazing yah? well im still dealing slowly with the peter process. It kills me to know the only guy ive ever loved- just isnt..// just isnt what you might ask? just isnt that guy anymore.. it kills me when i see couples holding hanfds, couples kissing, souples talking, anf fighting, and laughing. He was mine , he was my happiness.. and now its shred into a million billion puzzle pieces, and i only just found the corners.. my relationship with peter is gone, and that ruins everything.. why am i writing now...yah its his birthday today. after now talking to him for 3 weeks, i only wrote a letter, so i called to show my respect. He actually ansered his phone ,a and it was the hardest conversation. that lasted not even a minute. uhh i hate feeling like this. i feel like i want to always be with him,, but i need to do better for myself. why would a guy cheat on a girl. I doesnt make sense! mw + peter made sense.. but cheating?? Come on! who does that??? im sorry im just so angry with that sisutation. its so hard to move on, i want to but i constantly need him, i try everyday.. somedays ill make it, not think of him once and then theres the nights where crying seems like the only option to get my to fall alsleep. it doesnt help that every song reminds me of him, doesnt help that his pictures are all over the place. doesnt help that he doesnt care- i miss him.. i hate this feeling..everything reminds me of him/ blah! jess needs a tipppseyyy girlssss party.. FAST! post comment

goodbye jersey [22 Jun 2005|02:56pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | because of you ] everyone yesterday.. but my bon voyage party kicked hard core ass..!thanks to my loves! ( u kno who u are) TIPPSEYYY GIRLS! ) <33 jen is driving all the way to my dads house today so she can see me b4 i leave n i luff her! .. so yah so for all.. summer O5' live it up- no regrets! ( but be safe!) write me everything so im not totally lost when i get back.. Jessie Brown YMCA Camp Hi-Rock 162 East Street Mt. Washington, MA  01258   i love u all.. have an amazing summer.. Hi-Rock O5'<333 lets see what u bring me this year!<33 <3 jess 1 comment|post comment

[17 Jun 2005|06:50pm] one week till' HI-ROCK! yepparoo this time next week jess brown will be OUT of jersey! except im havin a hard time leaving my friends this year.. but at the same time sooo excited for camp! its gonna be an amazing x 1O! year! * tomorrow n monday are finals.. blah i cant wait till there oVER caz monday my best girls are sleepin here.. then tuesday i go to my dads.. then thursday is HR! whoop im so excited i started packing today.. and boyyyy so i have a lot..and im no where near done haha! what else is knew! haha   <3   1 comment|post comment

[14 Jun 2005|12:21am] [ mood | excited ] [ music | hello little girl - I2Tw ] i kno im not a senior but senioritis.. has deff hit me.. im not going to school again tomorrow ( due to the peer pressure from kaite + jess+ jen) yah we are hitting up the beach tomorrow.. i think point plesant.. im not sure i kno they wanted to hit up the board walk.. but wow last week i went down the shore on tuesday with alycia n friday i wasnt in school cb/c i went to look at marist college ( that which was awesome!!) so yah that means 5 days left + finals.. then hi-rock here i come all summer * MY LOvEs: liz cat betty! eric emma jeff ryan jake ganz pete derek ( lInNy in mY heArt!!) and all the otherz cannot wait! <333 1 comment|post comment

[27 Apr 2005|09:41pm] [ mood | relaxed ] [ music | no one is alone - I2tw ] really miss this song.. Baby you're all that I want When you're lying here in my arms I'm finding it hard to believe We're in heaven We're in heaven Oh, thinkin' about our younger years There was only you and me We were young and wild and free Now nothing can take you away from me We've been down that road before That's over now You keep me comin' back for more Baby you're all that I want When you're lying here in my arms I'm finding it hard to believe We're in heaven And lovin' is all that I need And I'm finally there in your heart It isn't too hard to see, We're in heaven We're in heaven Now nothing can change what you mean to me There's a lot that I could say But just hold me now Cause our love will light the way Baby you're all that I want When you're lying here in my arms I'm finding it hard to believe We're in heaven And lovin' is all that I need And I'm finally there in your heart It isn't too hard to see, We're in heaven Now our dreams are comin' true Through the good times and the bad I'll be standing there by you We're in heaven And your loving is all that I need When I'm finally there in your heart It isn't too hard to see We're in heaven Oh oh oh oh oh oh we're in heaven * that was my like graduation song haha! fromm 8th grade! haa GUYS IM OLDive been visiting colleges all week!* very scary but tons of fun! but its so hard to find a school that hads the exact majors i want.. caz YES jess is gonna double major.. in:1. commnuications - speciality in advertising 2. theater - focusing on directing..i really loved MULENBERG its in allentown PA...and i also loved ITHACA in Ithaca NY...o man i cant wait till this is all over tho! i went to syracuse n dickinson too...they were okay but i still have like 7 more colleges to still look at..i kno i have to go to boston, and rhode island still..and some other colleges..in MA and CT..possibly VT also... wow this is what it feels like to get older..its scary! IWANT SARAH MILLER TO COME WITH ME ! lol sar ilu! whew...im tired! lol LUFF U! 1 comment|post comment

sisterhood [22 Apr 2005|09:58pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | breakaway <3 ] well guys see ve been obsessed wth these books called " the sisterhood of the traveling pants" i mean they are like my whole life and i get so carried away in the stories..and guess what on JUNE 3rd the 1st book come out to be a MOVIE! and im over excited and anxious to see it A and im gonna see it hopefully with 2 of the sexy 6! liz n cat or corse! but look at thses pix...! im so excited...plus... JESS=BRIDGET! <3 4 serious... but u have to know the story! <33333 bee + eric <3 eric <- sooooo effin hottt! tibby n baily * carmen tibby lena bee kostos n lene <3     AHH I CANT WAIT ***   post comment

<3 [28 Mar 2005|12:36am] [ mood | blah ] [ music | darlin- bsb ] i had the most amazing night of my lif yesterday.. backstreet boy reunion tour! but i will update so much more on that.. when the pix are scanned into my comp.   but all i can say is ... BSB NOTICED ME N GAVE ME BUNNY EARS!!!! <33333333 you'll get the  whole story when the pix are posted<3 WAHOOO JESS KAT N JEN YAY!   so anyway..today was my twin cousins 2nd bday..it was cool i guess..i played poker with justin ryan n frankie...that was fun! ate alot of expensive food...make a bear..and yah...when i came home i watched my behind the scenes into the woods stuff... wow miss it majorr<3the  jen came over..n now im just chyllin ( easter bunny is setting stuff up for me n my brother outside my door right now i can here it haha ) * i got a mini  talk from justin about my love life..and being he is my best friend/ cousin it really did mean a lot..he told me i dont deserve how i have been treated from a particular boy and he has watched it for a while ( thats what u get when half ure family goes to the same school) n i could do better..but he has not idea whats its like ...but thats just because hes watching out for me...and im so thankfull for it..but i do have to mkae up my mind...its just so complicated...   yah sry for the venting...i guess this is what lj is for...but lj im back...hopefully? its fun to vent...but im hury n tired..and its time for a movie<3 goodnight post comment

[26 Mar 2005|12:38am] [ mood | bouncy ] [ music | out tonight ] tonight was fun! * went to louise's house for a lil * hit up the talent show which was fun ...chyllin with everyone lousie kaite alycia mike hannah jackie kate mike sam justin frankie amanda and more<3 *afterwards hit up applebees with alottaaaaa people...our table was...me lousie kaite mike justin charlie laura kristen summer mike alycia talia hannah..and yah more it was fn excpet when people leave n dont pay..so me n kaite n  justin mike n charlie went searchin for a house ! hha * just got home and thank god my mom is alsleep caz i couldnt deal with anymore yelling * i really hope she doesnt cause a scene tomorrow   and ive realized i could wait... wait for the day when you can see the way i see you.. trust me.. your worth it <3   night post comment

[24 Mar 2005|02:34pm] [ mood | crazy ] [ music | pop princess- click 5 ] heyy...so i kno i havent updated in like a bijillion years so this might take a while haha! ill list my topics for ya>.. 1.well lets start off at I2TWO5..our musical = amazing the show went absolutly outstanding! i miss it so much already<3 it has a big chunk of my heart and i need my drama nerds to survive..deffinatly miss that...heres some crazyyy pix.. all the cool kids<3 me n justin justin n jake in action ( video games that is) me n ilissa BfFl me n maris <3 LUfF U!* theres a ton more...just look at everyones myspaces haha there full of them ...but yah i really do miss this cast so much...my heart aches...   2. i hate being a junior! full of gettin ready to go to college shyt! its crazy! nsjkhbawsgljkvhnsbdlvhknsdbl! college visits n sat prep classes on weekends n college councler meeting suck ! all this n i better get myself into a good school<3   3.i missed skiing with the moores caz my dad is mean n thinks i did to much this year..! slki;lkn! i cried for a long time but what else is new.. kendell kat craig danny n brian ( my future husband? haha) called me everynight n ilu guys so much for it..but sleepover = soon...hopefully b4 kats party.!   4. my mom is a bitch...seriosuly everything is just going wrong at home...shes either suffering major PMS or i dunt even kno but i stay in my room the entire night...if i get out i like run so she cant think of an excuse to bitch at me..   5. JENNIE IS COMING FRIDAY caz were going to see the BACKSTREET BOYS REUNION TOUR! SHTT yah excited..for both...i think im gonna cry when i pick jennie up though havent seen her since xmas? how much does that suck! but friday she will be here! SCORE! 6.I HATE GIRLS I DONT EVEN KNO THAT GIVE ME DIRTY LOOKS IN THE HALLS>>>b/c jess doesnt do ANYTHING and this girl keeps giving me dirty looks every fuckin day and im sick of it...   7.i saw ashlee simpson on monday ! the show was outstanding ..and i met her opening act... ( the click five)  absolutly amazing...im in love with eric dill so BACK OFF! haha he gave me a hug and hes my new love<333 8 at the cast thing yesterday...t told me ( with her knowledge of horoscope shyt)  Im in love with being in love.. im a leader..im adventorous n im gonna follow what i wanna be..ill pursue it caz i believe it... ...( i think is awesome caz it does sound like me)   9, me  nn brandon had a heart to heart on the way home yesterday .. and i love him caz hes my bff...!   10. i made a collage of what i want my future to be..its sorta sweet..>!   11. i cant wait till formal! its gonna be kick ass! justin is my date which is sweet..and our table rocks.. sarah  n noah... kate n mike.. sam n jason.. jackie n jamie .. .<-excitement... except i dont have a dress yet ? haha o mean i have 2 backups incase i dont get one..but i wanna get mine in manhattan... chris is probably taking me in..so my moms gonna be real pissed about that..but could u imaine haveing a real dress from 5th avenue! shytt.. or even the village or something.. im exciteddd!   12. ME JEN MIKE N JUSTIN ARE GOING TO GO SEE PHANTOM!!!!! SWEEEEETTT!!!!!   13.. im totally the new click five groupie   and yah thats all i can think of now..good update... ill have to get time again soon and post a entry .. until then...TTFN!   <3 jessie 7 comments|post comment

[16 Feb 2005|11:02pm] If you read this, even if i don't speak to you that often post a memory of me. it can be anything you want, so long as it happened then post this to your journal and see what people remember about you 1 comment|post comment

[10 Feb 2005|11:02pm] [ mood | creative ] [ music | i never knew his name ] wow i havent updated in like a year ha jk! but seriosuly it has been long... blahh life is exhausting as usual.. what new humm... SKI SEASON: taking up everyweekend till march and i love it major but i dont kno why i havnt been kicked outa the play yet ha caz i  cant make weekends... but yah the next 3 weekends ill be in 3 different places.. this weekend = PA next weekend: CANADA! the weekend after that: VERMONT! ha told u ! no weekends open for jess! ahh the play iz awesome as usual tho for when i am there during the week! ha ! i love everyone ! YAY!  JESS GOT A JOB! wahoo at dunkin donuts! whoop .. i work with my bff kaite ! ha and i love it..and yah i dont kno how well its gonna work out with play practices but jess needed a job so im NOT quitting..! and yah..thats why im not doing softball this year so w/e... last weekend me n sarah spent the whole weekend together which was awesome! we saw BKLYN the musical and it was OUTSTANDING!!<333333 i loved it ...bert n ernie forever! GUITAR lessons kick ass.! i can play.. wild thing!! i just rock! haa love life : well dont have one haa u all prob kno by now that ive been crushin on jimmy for a while..i dont know where thats going..i doubt he likes me! but yah what else is knew.. * havent heard from hirock and im gettin so anxious! ahh i hope they hire me! dam im gonna literally die if i dont go im  gonna kill myself! ahh stress factor- hw this semester kills like a mother! ahhh :( i really miss jennie havent seen her since xmas.. blahh nOT FUN!   yah jr formal is approaching soon enough .. what another weight on my shoulders :\ post comment

and as the tears fall.. [16 Jan 2005|09:25pm] [ mood | thoughtful ] [ music | drive- ] okay so ive been thinking a lot this weekend which when i think always seems 2 stir up my mind. thought # 1 * what if i went back to old bridge. well along time ago in the 2nd grade..my mom made us move randomly and within 2 months we moved back home. i guess im still waiting for the relief. its been 3 years now. i mean i love jackson n all, but i think i just need to go back..just for a little..i miss it a lot. and i kno a can easily move in with someone ..cristina for instance..and theres plenty more that if i called n asked i would be more then welcome to trash their house..i think i really need it.. thought # 2 ever have flashbacks..of memories that will never be forgotten. yah i was cryin b4...over the summer me n liz with to ocean city 2gether..and the 1st night we just walked the beach for literally 2 hours maybe? and we solved all the worlds problems..i miss liz a lot. shes of of my best friends and im suffering ...and i went out to the movies 2 day and when i came home i went ito my computer room..and whats on the floor..a 1hr photo packet...so i look inside..and its some of the pictures liz had given me this summer from camp..ahh i hate it thought # 3 jennie needs to come to nj! i cant take it anymore..it sux real real bad!! thought # 4.. i dont need a boyfriend..i spend way to much of my time worrying abour guys..what they think of me..if he likes me..i dont care anymore..im not up for heartache..so why bother setting myself up for it. thought # 5 im begining to learn life isnt a fairy-tale. its not easy growing up..it basically sucks.. i just wanna have 1 day where all my wishes can come true...just 1 day... blahh 4 comments|post comment

[11 Jan 2005|10:46pm] [ mood | energetic ] [ music | hello little girl- into the woods ] hello guyysss well this past weekend ii went to VT with SKI CLUB! which was ABSOLUTELY AMAZING! myy roomies the nutters<3 hahahaha it was awesome!! YAY SKI SEASON! yah the end<3 2 comments|post comment

[07 Jan 2005|08:30pm] hey guys jay wrote me a poem...finally! lol i love it jay thanx ! bff Times we Fight You make me so mad sometimes. It could be your smile. It could be the way you talk. Or it could be a Kelly moment. But I know you mean well. I do over react sometimes. I do need to lighten up. My head is spinning because you drive me crazy. But I respect you as a person. Your smile makes you so innocent. The ways your eyes widen when your happy is cute. Things you do make you a great person. You always catch me at the wrong times. But in the end we are brother and sister. So it's okay that we fight. Your my sister post comment

stole form lindsay! [29 Dec 2004|11:14pm] [ mood | crazy ] [ music | i want u 2 want me ] me n mark! AWHH   dana liz me caris cat amanda caris liz me cat mark in my bed !   dana me caris amanda   my loves ( rutter & ganz ) ..eric = my dance partner...ganz--where are my glasses! haha <3 ya cabin 3 n me :) '   awh i miss it so much!! im gonna see liz n cat tomorrow WAHOOOOOOO!!!   post comment

[28 Dec 2004|12:39pm] last night was 2 crazy..i vented lol..sry guys.. moving right along... post comment

[28 Dec 2004|01:06am] [ mood | stressed ] [ music | dawsons creek ] wow how bi-polar is this of me i hate watching dawsons creek..it makesu realize everything u dont have did u ever feel like such a fuckin screw-up... im 16 years old n havent had 1 lating relationship..the kid im talking to lives in ct..i know doubting is bad but its gonna work out b/c i mean mentally id love more than anything to be with him..but physically i need to see him i havent found that group of people i always hang out with..i mean i have best friends, good friends i hang out with all the time...but i have so many friends / n a different variety of them too..its like a crayon box..some colors dont mix together well..so therefore i dont have thatconstant group that everyone else has.. i havent had that life when things are constant n perfect...parents divorced ..mom thru so many boyfriends, moving constantly, bad memories, losing people i love, its just to overwelming. ihavent found that guy who would do anything to see me, to be silent and watch me sleep, to love every moment together, to make a big deal out of me, to invite me to his house for his little brothers birthday party, SEE I hate DAWSONS CREEK... yet its my favorite show! new years resolution: not to chase anymore..im gonna wait <3 4 comments|post comment

[27 Dec 2004|11:32pm] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | daydream believer - the monkees ] so christmas this year was actually good! let me take ya thru it thursday- has the xmas eve eve party with my wonderful cousins thati love so much..we all caught up on stuff..played girl talk..which was OUR game way back when..!...exchanged gifts..( which i love!)and watched movies....yeah we are the walruses! ...me sam n kimmie are the girls..britt is the guy...of corse! haha but it was such a good time friday- went to aunt jens..surprising actually..me n justin had funN!...well every family event its me n him..i mean whats better a cousin thats ure bff! its great...we went xmas caroling and made 40$ off of one house..however we only got 5 bucks haa! O M G my mom let us have drinks! well wine coolers..haha my 1st full beverage ..of corse its with justin..nothing happened to me tho..i got made fun of caz i like red wine>?? lol that was funny.."hey justin...WHERRREE R U XMASSSSS?? haha"<3 u saturdau- XMAS!! hope everyones was good! mine was great! HIGHLIGHT GIFTS! sanata broung me a guitar! mii oWN! wahoo!!..a new sterreo! and a laptop! helll yah!!!!!! :) the xmas party at my dads was a hit again! i luffed it n had sucha good time.. OMG JESS IS A NEW FAN OF HE FAMILY GUY! my cousin got volume 1 and thats all we watched so i think with one of my million best buy gift certificates..im gonna get the family guy! haha im so excited...!!! yah so today- stayed in my pjs all day! literally...jennie came over!!! around 12? maybe ..we exchanged gifts! ((awhhi love it thans gurl)except jennie opened up m gift! hahahahhayahh ..we hung around..caught up..watched bruce almighty...jennie...lksdghsmbdgjklsnaksjgnsdg,k,jnjkjbn,xnd tittise rolls>>> in france? haha good tymes..yah she left around 3 maybe...( i miss her already! soon girl BEEF!) ...i spend the remaineder of the day setting up my awesone laptop! its amazing<<3333! yah i saw the terminal! o m g i loved it! haha so yah now im home doing nothing at all! tomorrow im babysitting n justin is sleeping over.. tuesday- still babysitting wendsay- going to NY! to liz's n cats! this should be one hell of a break! im so excited!!!!! yah man! sooo yah im talking to someone<3 and its cool! i sent him his xmas gift that i made him! he wil prob get it by tomorrow! cant wait for his reaction! so yah its time for me to get off the computer ..ive been on forever! but i wanna watch a movie badly! old school is what im feeling! haha good night yall! hope everyone has an awesone break:) ps - im killing myself on these dawsons creek re-runs..i need season 5 n 6! ahhh <333 post comment

[22 Dec 2004|10:01pm] [ mood | crazy ] [ music | seasons of love- rent ] holla! i cant believe its xmas time already..well actually still! holy cheese n rice!!! <3 jessie ps* <3 "im in love im in love and i dont care who knows it..hahah - elf"! post comment

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